No one's kicking U.S. soccer around
06/20/2002
Favorite World Cup quote: A distraught fan in Mexico City, tears
bleeding the flags on his painted cheeks, asks a reporter when it will
ever end, the disdain of these Americans who "treat us like rats and
idiots."
Rats and idiots? Hey, pal, this is the World Cup, not baseball labor
negotiations.
A sports culture primer: Political scientists tell us that extrapolating
social, political or cultural significance from a loss is unhealthy but,
unfortunately, not without precedent. Go ahead. Ask anyone from a
baseball town like New York or St. Louis or even Seattle what they think
of Dallas-Fort Worth and parts inbetween, and invariably they'll say,
"Rats and idiots."
Anyway, considering our image, the U.S.' previously poor soccer history
was not such a bad thing for the global condition.
As you know, Americans are not highly regarded in many parts of the
world, and not just because of The Weakest Link.
Americans are so good at so many sports that, frankly, it makes everyone
else sick. We have the best baseball, the best basketball, the best
boxing, the best bowling, and that's just our B games.
College sports? Did you realize that, in the rest of the world, patrons
of higher education don't even pay student fees? Go figure.
Nothing in European hockey eclipses the NHL variety, not since we bribed
all their best players to come over.
Nothing compares with the NFL. No one else even plays football indoors
like we do.
No one bikes like Lance Armstrong.
For awhile there, we lost our grip in tennis. Along comes Pete Sampras,
and then the Williams sisters pick up where he leaves off. Now we're so
cocky that we sent a 45-year-old woman out the other day in a Wimbledon
tune-up, and she beat the snot out of some 25-year-old Russian punk.
Best reason to date to dislike the U.S.: No one else has Tiger, and his
dominance alone may be enough to invite inquiries from NATO.
Still, even Tiger doesn't offend like this World Cup could. In the
history of modern sports, from its Golden Era right on through to the
platinum card, the rest of the world couldn't hold it against us because
we were good at soccer.
Good or bad, the world had its favorite sport all to itself: the
headers, the hooligans, the flips and the flops.
Sure, maybe everyone should have seen this coming. The U.S. has been to
four consecutive World Cups, and came into this one ranked 13th in the
world. Still, we finished last in France four years ago, and even that
didn't generate the kind of "Shame" headlines that the Germans read when
they lost one game in the Cup.
Now, with the U.S. playing Germany in the quarterfinals Friday morning,
you have to ask if this is really good for international goodwill.
Certainly it didn't go over well with the Mexico City fan, or the 200
Mexican fanatics that vandalized cars on an international bridge outside
El Paso the other day.
Maybe it didn't help that, in the throes of the U.S. victory, American
fans chanted, "Adios, amigos."
No one likes a smug neighbor, particularly a rich one. No one likes a
smug, rich neighbor who could be considered an underdog.
No one likes a smug, rich underdog that wins. The mere thought of
it has elevated the old-fashioned notion of "upset" to talk of soccer's
"new world order," which can't be going over well in the Old World.
Bruce Arena understands. Asked what would happen if the Germans should
lose to his team, Arena said, "They may not be heading straight back to
Frankfurt after the game."
And if the U.S. loses? The only way they don't come straight home is if
they detour through Vegas.
Win the World Cup, and what's next for the U.S.? What worlds are left to
conquer? A commitment to curling? Re-dedicate ourselves to Nordic
combined?
Hey, why not take our best athletes and just turn them loose?
If there's a work stoppage in baseball, hand A-Rod a cricket bat. Stuff
Ray Lewis in a rugby shirt. Give bowler Pete Weber a bocci ball.
Sumo Shaq?
Given all the resources here, it hardly seems fair. Of course, you could
say the same for the Rangers, and Tom Hicks isn't winning any peace
prizes.
E-mail
ksherrington@dallasnews.com.
