Reality

07:27 AM EDT on Friday, June 3, 2005

By BRIAN MORAN / Special to WCNC.com

With a newly crowned ‘American Idol’ preparing for stardom, a different kind of talent search contest hit the scene where the talent isn’t undiscovered. They’re just lost.

The idea is so simple that it’s brilliant: Give five bands with their careers in the toilet one more shot at the limelight. For four bands it will most likely be their last shot, especially Thursday night’s episode. The stakes are high and the train wreck potential ranks up there with the early rounds of 'American Idol' so we’re in for some good television.

I have got to admit NBC, I’m impressed. This one was too easy. Sure, you stole it from the Brits but so what; CBS did the same thing with ‘Survivor’ and they look like geniuses.

This revival has water cooler conservation turning heated. Someone playfully brings up the show and mentions some of the bands appearing and it turns into an all-out war over the best 80s song, the best one hit wonder, the most under-rated and the most over-rated bands. (‘Boys of Summer’, ‘Come On Eileen’, ‘Mr. Mister’, ‘Tears for Fears’) What bands will appear? What bands will fall flat on their face? The meaningless argument possibilities are endless.

Now when it comes to nostalgia, I set the market. I can’t hear a song from the 80s without questioning my own mortality so this could be really enjoyable or “poison yourself with Heinekens” depressing. When all was said and done, I think I’m alone now, but I really enjoyed the walk down memory lane.

As things kick off, I’m wondering if they’re going to take themselves too seriously or just have a good time mocking their shtick a la Vanilla Ice on the ‘Surreal Life’. In the show's first beat, it’s obvious it’s not the latter. Host Vernon Kay (Who?) describes Loverboy as a band who “conquered” the 80s. ‘Working for the Weekend’ finished 96th on the Billboard Hot 100 in 1982 and they never went higher. Nice try Vern.

When they hit the stage, I began to wonder if the 80s were like 40 years ago. Things have changed since they were “conquering” the 80s. The hairlines weren’t bad but the weight difference and the energy level was notable. It’s been a long time since lead singer Mike Reno donned the red leather pants, put it that way. He didn’t embarrass himself too badly. He played it safe, didn’t dance much, focused on the vocals.

I feel old already.

CeCe Peniston sounded a lot better. She looked good too, even better than in her playing days. When she belted out ‘Finally’ like it was yesterday, I could almost smell the Jersey Shore. Unfortunately, she crumbled with her second tune of “There You’ll Be” by Faith Hill. Her voice cracked repeatedly and she looked disappointed with her effort.

Much to the chagrin of true 80s fans, ‘Flock of Seagulls’ showed up without the Ace Ventura hairdo. He sported a baseball cap and a pony tail. (He’s bald.) Again, performing their hit ‘I Ran’ was just fine. But it got ugly when they went after Ryan Cabrera’s “On the Way Down”. Let's be honest, it's not the hardest song to pull off. He was out of tune the whole time. He distinctly changed the song's key, not sure if it was intentional. I had the sing the song to myself just to remind myself what he was after.

The train is off the tracks as people are diving for their lives at this point. Good stuff.

‘Arrested Development’ popped their head in after struggling for 12 years in a sophomore slump. They’re still together and collaborating in Georgia. They’ve pared the group down to five members from the 60 they brought on tour in 1993, which I think was productive. ‘Speech’, their lead singer, was a full two feet shorter than the host. They killed it with ‘Tennessee’ and added a rap to ‘Heaven’ by Los Lonely Boys. They were far and away the most talented act of the night.

NBC

The audience had their hands in the air for the entire performance of Arrested Development's "Tennessee".

The ultimate mall chick Tiffany is attempting a resurrection. She’s not 15 anymore. I think her career faltered when she ran out of songs to remake. Fittingly, she’s singing two remakes with ‘I think We’re Alone Now’ and Kelly Clarkson’s ‘Breakaway’. Besides the unreasonable amount of cleavage, it was dry and forgettable.

It doesn’t take Simon Cowell to realize ‘Arrested Development’ just gave their career another chance. This exposure could prove priceless if the show’s a hit.

All-in-all, I give it a B. The idea was so easy; it had to be good quality. But I felt it lacked proper support. The production value seemed low. The crowd looked like paid extras instead of impartial onlookers. There were so many standing ovations, I wondered if they were even given chairs.

I thought it was going to be a drawn out contest like 'America Idol'. I wanted to see bands get voted off and a record deal at the end. I wanted to see desperation in the faces of starving bands with mountains of debt playing their hearts out for a better life. It didn’t happen.

Hopefully, the ratings will be good and some money will wrap itself around the show. NBC has botched great ideas in the not too distant past; let’s just hope we don’t have another ‘Contender’ on our hands.