FOXBORO -- In the city of New York, the feds could never get anything to stick to mob boss John Gotti (aka The Teflon Don).
These days in upstate New York, the citizens are dealing with another slippery character in a far different field. Bills president and general manager Tom Donahoe (a.k.a. The Teflon Donahoe) has carved a swath of miscalculation and mediocrity in his three years in Buffalo.
Yet as the final sands of the Buffalo Bills' 2003 season tumble through the throat of the hourglass, blame for their 6-9 record is being laid primarily on the shoulders of two men -- head coach Gregg Williams and offensive coordinator Kevin Gilbride. And as the ax is being sharpened for those two, Donahoe skates.
Skates, even though he hired both men.
Skates, despite his Bills rolling up a 17-31 record since he took over on Jan. 10, 2001.
Skates, despite wasting a first-round pick this season on a player who couldn't contribute this season and may never -- injured running back Willis McGahee.
Skates, despite trading a first-round pick for Drew Bledsoe on the first day of the 2002 draft when nobody else in the league wanted him.
Skates, despite initially promising to not give up a first-rounder for Bledsoe.
Skates, despite actually telling everyone that he decided he had to have Bledsoe after watching him throw during warm-ups on a windy day in Buffalo.
Skates, even though he ignored eight years of film evidence that showed the abominable Bledsoe on display this year is merely a reprise.
Skates, even after signing fat Sam Adams to a $32-million contract in the offseason.
Skates, despite the disappointing performance of offensive tackle Mike Williams, whom Donahoe took fourth in the 2002 draft.
Skates, despite the average play of another plum free agent signing, linebacker Jeff Posey.
Skates, despite giving contracts to the staff of Gregg Williams that run even longer than Williams' does. A sure way to sow seeds of distrust and discontent among coaches.
Skates, even after signing Patriots safety Lawyer Milloy to the highest contract ever given a safety -- $9.8 million over the first two years alone -- when he's not even one of the best three safeties in the AFC East.
Skates, despite hiring Williams in the first place -- despite interviewing and deciding against Carolina's John Fox and Cincinnati's Marvin Lewis.
Skates, despite having sowed the seeds of discontent by bringing in overmatched coaches and quarterbacks and mismatched philosophies.
Skates, despite saying, "It's my job to try and keep everybody in this building (together), to keep the ship afloat," then having his defense carp at his offense this past Sunday.
Skates, even as he gags on this smug comment about Milloy: "We think he's still a good football player. (New England) does, too. They tried to keep him. We heard a lot of stories out of New England last year that (Drew) Bledsoe was washed up, too, so draw your own conclusions."
Skates, even though the Bills are arguably worse off now than they were when Donahoe got there, what with a quarterback who can be a Pro Bowler one year and an embarrassment the next, too many overpriced players on defense, a budding running back controversy and a No. 1 wide receiver soon to be 31.
Why does he skate??
"It's his track record," an AFC personnel man said Saturday. "Whether that's the case now or not, I don't know. Drew Bledsoe was good for them last year. He brought some life back to the franchise. I don't know if you can say it was a bad move. But Williams was his hire. Gilbride was his hire. And Bledsoe is just not what he should be."
Neither are the Bills. And at some point, people are going to get over the fact Donahoe had a nice run as the Steelers' head personnel man in the 1990s (six straight playoff runs) and start scrutinizing what he's doing now. But that scrutiny will come later rather than sooner since Donahoe is a reliable and cooperative media source.
But good guy or not, the credit for swinging a trade with the Rams for Jerome Bettis in 1996 has to expire at some point.
Donahoe will be the one who'll have to let Williams and Gilbride go. Throughout the season, though, he's been supportive.
"Somebody told me a long time ago, when you point the finger, there's more fingers pointing back at you," Donahoe said. "And it's a good reason not to play the blame game."
Sure is. Otherwise, everyone might see who really should take the blame for the disappointing Bills.
