We are writing in regard to Bishop Thomas J. Tobin's Oct. 14 letter ("Gay marriage is gravely immoral"). As the two women who were recently married in Massachusetts, we felt compelled to respond to his comments.

Although he writes that his remarks are not "aimed personally" at us, he argues that our "disturbing," "gravely immoral" and "spiritually harmful" marriage will "erode the foundation of society." Needless to say, it felt a bit personal.

Bishop Tobin does not know us but grossly mischaracterized our lives. We have been involved in a loving relationship for 18 years. We are raising two wonderful children who are growing up to be compassionate, inquisitive, and kind. We wanted to be married to provide our children with the legal protections they may need and provide our relationship with the security it deserves. What could the Church find immoral in protecting children and creating secure families?

The immorality surrounding same-sex marriage lies only with those seeking to perpetuate discrimination. Contrary to the position of Bishop Tobin, those of us seeking to end it are firmly positioned on the moral high ground.

MARY NORTON

WENDY BECKER

Providence