Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered weak and weary,

Over many rich delights that I was greatly longing for:

Chocolate ice cream, then a truffle, chocolate cake with chocolate ruffle,

All the cravings I must muffle, muffle, though it pained me sore.

“Eat some broccoli,” I muttered, “even though it pains you sore —

Only this, and nothing more.”

Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak December,

But the following November opened up a bolted door.

So that now when I am eating ice cream, I’m no longer cheating,

And my joy’s no longer fleeting, fleeting as in days before.

Lush dessert is not beyond me, as it was in days before.

What’s the secret? Lipitor!

—Felicia Nimue Ackerman

(First published in the American Philosophical Association’s Newsletter on Philosophy and Medicine.)