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M. Charles Bakst

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m. charles bakst

M. Charles Bakst: Seasonal times call for names and rhymes

12.24.1995

Chanukah's candles burn, celebrating a miracle of light

And the wonder of Christmas makes itself felt tonight.

We are closing out Year One of a new governor's reign

Had you predicted this course, they would have called you insane.

Isn't Linc Almond the guy who said no to a mall?

But after revising the deal, he has a right to stand tall.

Soon Providence Place will rise, and with it our hope

This much-battered state will bust out of its mope.

Still, we're not likely to break through to a new dimension

As long as politicians can practice the art of the pension.

And while lottery bigwigs fly off to Las Vegas high times,

Leaving the rest of us to pay, with our pennies and dimes.

Arrogance, slothfulness, hypocrisy and greed -

These are politicians' bywords, and ignore folks in need.

Still, at this holiday time, it's worth taking a pause

To greet those who write, execute and interpret our laws.

You may think them spooky, they give you bad vibes

But they provide us great copy, which is important to scribes.

If the truth were known, some officials serve well

Like one soon retiring, the fabled Claiborne Pell.

But we'll still have John Chafee, who has plenty of heft

Even if fellow Republicans think him too left.

Nancy Mayer thirsts to join this nearly all-male club

But can she defeat Jack Reed? - ah, that's the rub.

A parade is forming to fill the Second District seat:

Bob Weyand's moving from the First, a controversial feat.

He's meeting up with a tiger, the fierce Kathy O'Hare

And two folks from Warwick: Linda Sullivan, Joe McGair.

The hot rumor around says the Violet, Arlene

Also's moving to join the Second District scene.

Congressman Patrick Kennedy looks like he has a free ride

At least while Republicans continue to hide.

Over in the Bay State, there's Kennedy's dad

That's Senator Ted - he makes conservatives mad]

And if John Kerry's to stay and add to debate there

He'll need turn back Bill Weld, the tall guy with red hair.

Before we leave Massachusetts, we want to pull rank,

And wish Happy Chanukah to the Barney named Frank.

Fry up some latkes, give the dreidel a spin -

There are a lot of names we've got to get in.

Like Ed Morabito, the governor's chief aide

And communications man Jim Taricani, who's also well paid.

If you have a problem on welfare or want to air a beef

Contact Christine Ferguson, the Human Services chief.

Now we're moving, you could say we're rollin' -

So let's drop by Health and check on Patricia Nolan.

At DOT, where they focus on traffic lanes

I wish Bill Bundy would do more with trains.

If you're eying Fidelity Investments or any other new biz,

Call Marcel Valois, the Economic Development whiz.

Before we forget, it's important to stop

And salute Ed Culhane, the state's top cop.

Here's a question. Did you know

Attorney General Jeff Pine likes a boxing show?

And here's a guy who's everywhere - and never comes late

That would be Jim Langevin, our secretary of state.

Hurrah for Don Wyatt on the Lottery Commission

He tries to keep John Hawkins in line, an impossible mission.

Roll out the Yule log, gather close to the fire

At the General Assembly, there are votes for hire.

In legislative dealings, at the very core,

Is House Speaker John Harwood, pal of the great Bobby Orr.

Then there's another who helps keep the Democrats in step:

The name's George Caruolo, a mighty powerful rep.

Some members are newcomers, they hedge all their bets

But others are veterans: George Castro, Harold Metts.

Some members are huge talkers, a few are more mellow

But always fighting for choice is Edith Ajello.

On issue after issue, one rep dares stand alone

Ladies and gentlemen, meet Sandy Barone.

Senate Majority Leader Paul Kelly thinks big, his head in the sky

Some day he'll run against Almond, to become the number one guy.

Also warming up is Paul Tavares - hear what he says

Because one day he run to become general treas.

And while we're in the lofty Senate environs

We don't want to bypass the feisty Bill Irons.

There are two others to cite, they seldom speak ill:

The Perry named Rhoda, the Fitzpatrick named Will.

May it please the court, we'll now approach the bench

To try to find anyone we could label a mensch.

Fortunately the Supremes are full of this type,

Led by Chief Justice Joe Weisberger, whose time finally proved ripe.

Next come Murray, Florence, and Lederberg, Vicky

(I swear: Writing this poem can get very tricky.)

And the newest Supreme, remembered by many a con

That would be Justice Bourcier, known as Maximum John.

Who's the Superior Court judge with the freshest of looks?

It must be Frank Williams, collector of A. Lincoln books.

District Court Judge Rogeriee Thompson's without peer

Which is why we so often mention her here.

You might not tab Providence's City Council holy

But we still can celebrate Evelyn Fargnoli.

And on the School Board, come what may

You'll always get the truth from Bianca Gray.

Speaking of city officials unique,

There's Buddy Cianci, whom you'd never call meek.

By the way, Mayor, although we may disagree on your ends

Do you think some day we could emerge as friends?

Nah, I guess not.

All over Rhode Island are folks who are great

They help make this place a much better state.

At the Chamber of Commerce, Jim Hagan, Laurie White

Bring to our business climate a measure of light.

Larry Fish steers Citizens Bank on a profitable glide

With P.R. aides Jim Dorsey, Babs Cottam along for the ride.

And in labor are two guys with roles that are key:

AFL-CIO chief Frank Montanaro, and his close friend George Nee.

In a year of great triumph, when they excelled on their stage

Let's note gay rights lobbyists Julie Pell and Marc Paige.

Amos House could use your money or volunteer toil:

Ring up Deborah Brayton or else Cindy Doyle.

The Boys & Girls Clubs of Warwick help many a teen

Here's a cheer for their director, old pal Flo St. Jean.

If you're down on your luck or see it's mislaid

Find Marion Avarista or Tom McDonough at Travelers Aid.

The Rhode Island Philharmonic owes much to Gayl Doster

And Vocational Resources to Jen and Jack Foster.

A pause for breath, and now let's get on with the task -

Which reminds me of a fellow I saw in a mask.

The Phantom visited PPAC and pronounced it first rate

Why not? Joe Walsh and Lynn Singleton head up its slate.

Whether the picture here brightens or whether it worsens,

Photographers Steve and Julie Brigidi are Remarkable Persons.

Ditto for artist David Macaulay, boat designer Eric Goetz,

Plus Ira Magaziner, who serves Bill Clinton 'til it hurts.

Let's place a call to Mary Ann Sorrentino in Radio Land,

Hi John Carpilio, Greg Perry, Lori Kiley of WHJJ's band.

Hello Susan Farmer and the Channel 36 crew,

Rhode Island views the Lively Experiment you do.

Some pols deem Dyana Koelsch's questions mean

But her talent brightens the Channel 10 screen.

Barbara Meagher, Jeff Derderian and others at 6

Drive Bad Folks crazy with their You Paid for It kicks.

When it comes to newspapers - and I'm not lyin'

The best columnist around is Dickinson, Brian.

We've run out of space but not of good cheer -

Peace and health to all in the coming new year.

* * *

M. Charles Bakst is Journal-Bulletin political columnist.