Owen Wilson, Jennifer Aniston and “Marley” walk the beach in a scene from Marley and Me.

20th Century Fox / Barry Wetcher

Dog lovers made newspaper columnist John Grogan’s book Marley & Me, about a mischievous but loveable yellow Lab, an international bestseller.

It’s not likely that the screen version, which stars Owen Wilson as Grogan and Jennifer Aniston as his wife, Jenny, will find equal success.

Director David Frankel’s movie seems flat and all on one plane, a series of misadventures revolving around an unruly dog. Frankel kept his previous film, The Devil Wears Prada, fast, lively and clever. Marley and Me is filled with everyday adventures, never rising above sitcom status.

Wilson’s Grogan says right up front that Marley & Me is a movie about “The world’s worst dog … or so I thought at the time.”

But for most of the movie’s running time Marley, named for reggae star Bob Marley, does indeed seem like the worst dog in the world. One wonders why the Grogans put up with Marley who, though cute and cuddly looking, creates a hurricane of havoc no matter where he goes. A dog trainer (the once glamorous Kathleen Turner, now unfortunately looking like the definition of middle-age spread) gives up on him as untrainable.

Marley is one of those dogs you see dragging their masters around when out for a walk.

A dog sitter calls him “Evil with a dog face.”

Off his leash, Marley runs away.

Most dogs like to hang their heads out of car windows. Marley sees it as a means of escape, even if the car is moving at a good clip.

If there’s a piece of furniture to knock over or a mess to be made in the kitchen, Marley is certain to be behind the calamity. Even Jenny, eventually frustrated by being home alone to take care of two kids and Marley, has second thoughts about keeping the dog. Watching Marley & Me, one might wonder why anyone would put up with such a critter … and for years.

There’s no real answer to that question, which hangs over the film, at least until Marley gets old and infirm. Then one feels sorry for Marley. Actually, when he’s unable to move very much on his own, Marley seems like the perfect dog.

Trying to build a film around this has proven to be a daunting task. The domestic family tale is mundane. The most interesting character is Eric Dane of TV’s Grey’s Anatomy as Grogan’s skirt-chasing reporter pal who gets to cover hot international stories and has never met an attractive woman he didn’t try to take out.

Grogan takes a job at the Ft. Lauderdale Sun-Sentinel, where he’s moved from reporting on smalltime stories, which he loves, to writing a column, which he doesn’t want to do. But it proves to be his calling, as he gets advice from a crusty, but soft-hearted editor (Alan Arkin). Having made a name for himself in Florida, Grogan next takes a reporter’s job at the Philadelphia Inquirer, where his personal writing style doesn’t fit well with straight news. “I want less you and more facts,” barks his editor.

Question: Why would the Inquirer hire Grogan as a reporter when his obvious calling is as a columnist? And why doesn’t Grogan realize this himself until almost too late?

Making even less sense is the enormous house in the countryside that the Grogans move into on a reporter’s salary. One fears they must be in hock up to their necks. Can you say, “Foreclosure?”

But then Marley & Me is only treading water until the dog grows old and feeble. Ah, finally some emotional meat to this shaggy dog tale. Just remember, however, that not all Hollywood endings are happy ones.

**Marley & Me

Starring: Owen Wilson, Jennifer Aniston, Eric Dane, Alan Arkin, Kathleen Turner.

Rated: PG, contains themes that could upset young children.

mjanuson@projo.com